Helping Others With Their Journey: #SufferingInSilence Is Available #NotOneMoreVet #journaling

 

Released July 8, 2016

 

Hello my friends,

It’s been a while since I checked in. I’ve been swamped with writing, edits and battling severe burnout and depression from my day job as a veterinarian. The darkness and despair became too much for me and I turned to my poetry to express everything swirling in my mind. Before I knew it, I had over a dozen poems and I could see light at the end of the tunnel as the saying goes. It’s still far off but getting closer and brighter. I put fifteen of the collection I’d written together in a journal in hopes that my journey would be a guide to others. I want this journal to be a safe haven for those suffering as I do. I don’t want them to feel lost and alone. I did and I have my husband to lean on and colleagues who are supportive. Even with that, I still was overwhelmed with it all.

Veterinarians have the highest suicide rates of any of the medical professions now. If we don’t stand up and help each other, who will?

This is my journey back into the light. Our paths through this may not be the same, but we have a common goal to get back into the love and light again. I hope this journal is a way for others to map out their steps back and let their voices be heard. I want to hear them all ROAR!

At the moment Suffering in Silence is available through Createspace and Amazon. More retailers to follow!

 

Here is one of the poems in the journal. When my coworkers read it, they all cried. This is what we go through each and every day.

 

Suffer in Silence

The Noblest of Professions
Calls to those with caring hearts.
No one tells you about the secret
That will tear your soul apart.

Bit by bit it eats away at your humanity.
To survive you must shut off your emotions
Or your mind gives up
And crosses over into insanity.

Happy, joyous occasions
Become fewer and farther between.
As our patients grow older,
Their bodies become frail and lean.

Still we’re expected to soldier on,
With a smile on our face.
Never mind the price we must pay
With each and every case.

By our hands one more life is ended.
Their pain they suffer no more.
But who grieves for us
When yet another is carried through the door?

The Noblest of Professions…
That much is true.
Would anyone want to still be a part of it
If they knew what they’d be asked to do?

Ending another’s suffering comes at a price
That in the end is far too steep.
Could you stand by as the end draws near
And not allow yourself to weep?

Someone must take up the mantle.
Someone must know what to say
To those whose pets suffer so,
Whose broken lives must end today.

The members of the Noblest of Professions
Die a little every day.
We remember each life we’ve held in our hands
The loss of our hearts is the price we must pay.

The Noblest of Professions must carry on
And Suffer in Silence.
To do anything else would make them appear
Self-absorbed, uncaring, and defiant.

Truth of the matter is
We suffer every day.
We carry the burden.
Our compassion is the other price we must pay.

Will you take up the mantle?
Could you die a little every day?
Will you heed the call of the Noblest of Professions
Even knowing the price you must pay?

©Tammy Dennings Maggy 2016

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Curse of the #FirstBornCain is Now Available! #paranormal

Released July 12, 2015

Released July 12, 2015

I’ve gone and done it again! I told you I was going to release the first book of The Kayne Legacy Series on it’s own, separate from the Season of Sun and Sin collection…

And here it is!

The cover is something different than you’re used to seeing from Sassy Vixen Publishing for my books but we wanted to make this series different from the erotic romances and erotica I usually write.

Yes this book has some hot sex scenes but the story as a whole isn’t a romance. This is Cain’s journey to save mankind from destruction at the hands of his brother Malachi. It’s the start of the entire legacy all of the Kayne family must accept or turn their back on forever.

For those of you who have read my vampire inspired poetry book Courtship of the Vampyre, you already know the basic outline of the series and have been introduced to a few of the main characters. There is so much more coming your way! You need to grab this one and immerse yourself in this heartbreaking tale of Cain’s early years.

And here you all thought you knew his story. Think again!

Blurb

In the first book of the Kayne Legacy series, we meet reporter Abigail Matthews after she is awarded the interview of a lifetime. She’d been granted no holds barred access to everyone associated with one of the most powerful foundations in the world, including the current CEO Michael Kayne.  Sparks fly between them the moment they meet but nothing compared to the jolt she receives when she comes face to face with Michael’s grandfather—the biblical legend Cain.

In hopes she’d accept her destiny as his grandson’s chosen mate, Cain opens up and shares his heartbreaking tale— everything from the tragic fight with his brother Abel to his journey to find Lilith and make her his wife. Together they were to create a family of immortals sworn to protect the Essence of the Tree of Life from the one hell bent on destroying it.

Excerpt

Thousands of Years Ago, Somewhere in the Middle East

 Cain secured the last stone into place and stood back to survey his work. He stretched his legs and rubbed the kink out of his lower back as he circled the altar. He’d spend hours in his gardens and the surrounding forests in search of the perfect pieces for his offering to The Three. Each stone, piece of wood and plant held special meaning to him and as such had to be included.

In addition to the first fruits of his garden, he’d included the largest of the fish he’d caught in his nets that morning as well as six of the freshest eggs from the nests of the waterfowl inhabiting the nearby marsh. He’d asked the animals permission as he’d gathered and thanked them for blessing him with a beautiful bounty to share with the gods.

The serenity he’d enjoyed on his venture came to an abrupt end as his brother made his presence known.

“Those won’t appeal to them you know. They want a blood sacrifice and they’ll accept no less. You should know that by now.”

Cain rolled his eyes and sighed. Why can’t he mind his own affairs and leave me to worship in peace?

 “It’s none of your concern, brother. How I present my gifts to Them is no reflection on you or how you choose to worship.”

Abel snorted. “Do you really think your paltry offering will help you win Jezebel’s heart and hand once more? The decision has been made. I’ll make her my mate before the next full moon.”

“I won’t argue with you about this anymore. Father feels you would be the better match for our sister. I have no choice but to accept it and move on. Jezebel has made it clear she’ll not go against the wishes of our parents either. You’ve won, yet again.”

Cain reached for his gathering bag and attempted to walk away rather than continue their fight one more day. Unfortunately, Abel had no intention of leaving.

“I’m not through with you yet. Jezebel has asked to wear a jade pendant during our ceremony. She mentioned you found one large enough for me to carve into the shape she desires.”

Cain glared. “No. It’s part of my offering. I have others for you to choose from to use for her necklace. This one belongs to the Goddess Fate.”

“What does it matter? They’ll not accept your offering whether the stone is included in it or not. Why should it go to waste when I can make better use of it?”

Cain stood his ground. “I’m the elder brother and you’ll show respect to me in front of The Three. I’ll not allow you to treat me this way, not today.”

Abel’s laughter cut Cain deeper than any sharp rock. “What makes today different from any other? You may’ve been born before me, but you mean nothing to our parents. In fact, it would be much easier on all of us if you would never have been born.”

He leaned against a nearby tree and sneered. “Why do you think no one remembered today would be special to you? If they cared at all, we would have dedicated the entire day to celebrate the moment you were born. Instead, our family chose to forget and live their lives as if you never existed.”

Cain’s stomach clenched. “Leave me, before we both say and do things we’ll regret later.”

“You have something I want and I’ll not leave until I have it. You can give it to me freely or I’ll take it from you like I’ve taken everything you’ve held dear. Good thing father came to his senses. I’d hate to see what kind of life you would be able to provide for our beautiful sister.”

“I would’ve cared for her and our children until the day I died. They would’ve wanted for nothing.”

Abel doubled over with laughter that echoed throughout the forest. “With you they would have nothing. Why on earth would she ever want to marry a man the gods themselves have ignored?”

“You interrupted me before I finished my preparations. My offering isn’t complete—”

“Oh, so now you must give your heartfelt plea for Them to accept your shortcomings as one of Their creations? You insult the gods and bring shame to our family.”

“Shame? I’ve done nothing to you to warrant your insolent behavior toward me. Leave me if you’re so shamed by my mere existence.”

“Not until I have that jade.”

As Abel took another step toward him, Cain snatched the gemstone from the altar and stuffed it into his gathering bag. “You’re still welcome to any of the other stones I’ve gathered but this one is spoken for and not to be touched.”

Abel grabbed the bag and yanked. “Give it to me now!”

Cain leaned back with all of his weight and held fast. The handle of the bag slid out of Abel’s grasp and burned his palms.

“You would mark me so before my wedding?” He stared at his bloodied hands in disbelief.

“You brought this upon yourself. If you would’ve left me alone as I’d asked, this wouldn’t have happened. When will you learn you can’t force people to bend to your will? Your cruelty will catch up to you in time and your life will be as black as your heart.”

Abel didn’t appear to hear one word Cain had said. “When father sees what you’ve done to me—“

“Go ahead. Make up another wild tale about how I’ve mistreated you. What does it matter now? As you’ve pointed out, you have everything that had been promised to me. All I ask now is to be left alone.” Once again Cain attempted to walk away.

Abel latched onto both of Cain’s upper arms and dug his fingers into the skin and muscle. “You’re not going anywhere until you pay for this.”

Cain narrowed his eyes. His body temperature rose and his cheeks burned. No more of this. I’ve had it with his antics. He planted both palms against Abel’s chest and pushed with all his strength. “Leave. Me. Alone!”

Abel’s eyes flew open and he appeared stunned by Cain’s sudden outburst. He frantically swung his arms around in an attempt to regain his balance, but to no avail. He toppled backward and crashed into the wood and stone altar.

An unmistakable pop sounded as his head connected with the corner stone. Blood pooled and then covered the surface.

Cain rushed to his brother’s now still body and lifted him into his arms. The back of Abel’s head gave way at his touch. His life force continued to flow from the gash and covered Cain’s hands and chest as rocked back and forth. “What have I done? Abel! Wake up. Please, wake up.”

Abel’s eyes glazed over as his spirit left his body.

Cain stood and ran through the forest to Abel’s altar. He placed his brother’s body on the center and then raised his bloodied hands to heaven. “Please. I beg of you. Bring him back. Take me instead.”

Screams and wails erupted behind him and brought him out of his own grief. He spun around to find his mother, sisters and brother Malachi with their eyes wide with shock. Eve dropped to the ground in a heap at the base of the altar. “My son! My beautiful boy!”

Malachi stepped forward, removed Abel’s lifeless body for the stone slab and placed it on the ground. “What have you done, brother? How could you do this?”

Cain shook his head. “He fell against my altar—“

“You mean you killed him upon your altar!”

“No…”

“You wanted him gone so you could have Jezebel’s hand again.”

“No!” Why will he not believe me?

Cain knelt beside Eve. “Mother? Please hear me.”

She turned from him and ignored his plea. She raised her hands to the sky. “Why have you allowed this to happen to your favored son? His innocent blood cries out for justice…”

The women cried louder as their mother collapsed over Abel’s body and became inconsolable.

Cain’s other brothers arrived and shouted at him. They, too, demanded he be brought to justice. Malachi’s voice rang out over all the others. As they circled him, intending to do him harm, the sky rumbled and then exploded with flashes of lightening.

There in front of them stood Lucius in his black flowing robes. His amber colored eyes blazed with the intensity of the sun. He lifted his staff and shield to protect Cain. “Step away from your brother. No one is to lay another hand on him.”

“But he killed Abel. Surely you’ve heard our mother’s cries for justice. Let us punish him for this heinous crime against our family and The Three.”

Lucius raised one dark eyebrow and he clenched his jaw. “Not one of you here are without sin. Why would We allow any of you to speak for Us?

Malachi stepped forward. He alone appeared unafraid of the god. “He took Abel’s life in anger.”

“And how do you know this?” Lucius tilted his head and waited for an answer.

“He said as much when we found him here with Abel’s body.”

“Really? That’s not what We saw take place. Do not dare to speak of something you didn’t witness with your own eyes. Abel is as much to blame as Cain—if not more.”

Eve shrieked. “Abel! Abel! Bring back my son.”

Lucius turned toward the copse of trees behind the altar. “Adam, stop hiding and remove your mate from my presence. It’s time you grieve for your sons together for you are also at fault here for allowing this behavior to continue. Go now. Prepare him for burial. The rest of you will stay.”

“Why do you punish them? They’ve done nothing to deserve this.” Malachi appeared to shake in anger.

“That’s right. They’ve done nothing to stop Abel from putting himself before all of you and your needs. Their inability to rein him in and teach him humility led to this sad day.”

“Then they’ve paid the ultimate price with the loss of his life. Now Cain should have to do the same.” Malachi lunged but was met in midair by a protective force field and his body slammed to the ground.

“Once again your true self emerges, Malachi. You’re no different than Abel with your defiance. Do not test my patience any further or you’ll pay the consequences. Fate won’t intervene on your behalf. My decision here today will be final. Yeshua has granted me full authority to do as I see fit.”

Seth helped Malachi to his feet and then turned toward the god with his head lowered in deference. “Please, Lucius. Tell us why you’ve allowed this to happen? Abel was the best of us. Now we are lost.”

Jezebel fell to her knees before Cain and clutched at his chest. “If you’ve ever loved me, kill me now so I may join my betrothed.”

Cain’s heart shattered. Even Jezebel believes I did this on purpose. “I could never do what you ask of me.”

Jezebel collapsed against his chest and sobbed.

Cain tried to hold her but Malachi ripped her from his arms. “You can’t harm her but you could smash Abel’s head against the corner of your altar?”

“I didn’t do it.”

“You lie! Go ahead and compound your crime before the gods. You’ll not get away with this.”

Lightening flashed across the sky and the earth shook. “You will say no more, Malachi. The decision has already been made.”

“If it doesn’t include wiping Cain off the face of the earth, then I’ll not listen to another word from you.”

Cain closed his eyes and braced himself for what he was sure would be the last time he would hear Malachi’s voice ever again.

BUY LINKS (updates to follow when each goes live)

All Romance/Omnilit

Kobo

Page Foundary/Intera

Smashwords

Amazon

Barnes and Noble…coming soon

iTunes

Oyster

I hope you enjoy the book! Let me know what you think of it and if you like where this series is headed. Don’t know yet? Grab the poetry book as a companion to the series. It will be your guide to all things Cain, Lilith and their descendants.

~Tammy

@dochappycamper Rings in the New Year with a New Release! #bisexual #EroticRomance #vampires

Curse of the First Born Cain promo

 

Happy New Year!  It’s already a great one as 2015 has started off with a bang. SEASON OF SUN AND SIN has finally been released! After all the delays it’s finally out on Amazon. For a limited time, it will be exclusively with them. If you’re a member of Amazon’s Kindle Unlimited borrowing program or Kindle Prime, you’ll be able to read this collection for free. For the rest of us it’s still a steal at $2.99. For less than the price of a Starbuck’s cup of coffee you’ll enjoy two erotic tales from me and one form my alter ego Lia Michaels.

Here are the blurbs for my two novellas:

Bound in Paradise

final Reflection for Sun and SinUp and coming L.A. artist Julia Santos had searched for a Domme strong enough and confident enough in their relationship to allow her to be wild and free while trusting her to give over complete control to them in private. Unfortunately very few meet up with her expectations.

Except one.

Carmen Hall had longed for a partner who would be more than her pet, one who would challenge her skills as Mistress and yet offer themselves to her—heart and soul. She’d all but given up until she laid eyes on the fiery Julia.

Join Julia as she remembers her early days with Carmen and a love that spanned over two decades and would know no bounds.

 

Curse of the First Born Cain

In the first book of the Kayne Legacy series, we meet reporter Abigail Matthews after she is awarded the interview of a lifetime. She’d been granted no holds barred access to everyone associated with one of the most powerful foundations in the world, including the current CEO Michael Kayne. Sparks fly between them the moment they meet but nothing compared to the jolt she receives when she comes face to face with Michael’s grandfather—the biblical legend Cain.

In hopes she’d accept her destiny as his grandson’s chosen mate, Cain opens up and shares his heartbreaking tale— everything from the tragic fight with his brother Abel to his journey to find Lilith and make her his wife. Together they were to create a family of immortals sworn to protect the Essence of the Tree of Life from the one hell bent on destroying it.

 

Both of these stories are close to my heart. Bound in Paradise is the answer to all the questions about how Julia and Carmen from The Surrender of Julia (Now and Forever 3) first met. While it’s not an official part of the series, the companion novella fills in some of the blanks in their love story that I thought were important to tell. Julia is such a colorful, heart-wrenching character and many have felt a kinship with her. She fought her way through hell and back again to be with Carmen. This novella gives you another glimpse of her past and what she did to overcome it.

Curse of the First Born Cain is the beginning of my new Kayne Legacy series. Two years ago I started writing this for NaNoWriMo and it took a life all on it’s own. Cain spoke to my soul and I had to tell his story. First I outlined it through poetry in The Courtship of the Vampyre.  Through the poetry I became totally immersed in Cain’s world from the loss of all he’d ever known to his life with Lilith. Here is a man who only wanted his father’s love and acceptance. He’d been denied it at every turn. Come to find out, he was the Chosen One to carry out the mission his parents lost. Through him, man’s greatest gift would be protected. When his story came to me, I had to tell it. My editor remarked a few times that she could tell Cain’s story is close to me. It is. I hope as a reader you will see it too.

Until next time,

~Tammy

#Thunderclap Campaign is Underway for my #Inspirational #Poetry

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Click on the banner to take you to our Thunderclap page

Welcome back to Behind Closed Doors. Today I would like to ask a favor. I’ve started a Thunderclap campaign for my first book of poetry. Not only was it the first of the poetry to be put out there for all to see, it was the very first book I published myself through Sassy Vixen Publishing. It was only the second book I had out there after For the Love of Quinn with Siren Bookstrand.

Print version from Amazon and Barnes and Noble

January 1st marks the third anniversary of the release of Follow Me: Poetry from the Heart and Soul. Besides chronicling my path through some of life’s most challenging moments, it’s a journal of my evolution as a writer.All the ups and downs are there: love, loss, betrayal, destruction of self esteem and redemption. All can be said for working my way through the highs and lows of the publishing world.

That’s right. The world of a published author isn’t all five star reviews, wine and roses. It’s full of blood, sweat, and tears…a hell of a lot of tears. Some of them are happy, while others are bittersweet. During the last three years I’ve seen and experienced quiet a bit from success to failure, from excitement to despair, from nervous butterflies waiting for reviews to the heartbreaking betrayal of fellow authors.

Reading through these poems again reminded me just how far I’ve come as a person, lover, wife, friend, poet and author. I’ve built walls around my heart and have developed an even thicker skin than I had when I submitted that first manuscript to Siren. I’m far from perfect—just like my characters and their stories. I write about real, honest, and often gut-wrenching emotions. Sometimes the scenes aren’t pretty, but in the end the characters find their way through and into the arms of the one who completes them heart and soul.

Follow Me New cover LargeWill you help me celebrate these poems by supporting me in my Thunderclap campaign? All you have to do is click on the photo/banner above, or here. I have until midnight on December 31st to meet the goal of 100 supporters so the campaign will go live over Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr. It’s easy to do. Click on the outlets you would like to support the campaign on and Thunderclap does the rest. They will only post the one spot and will not have access to your accounts to do anything else.

At the time of this post, with 11 days left, we are at 46 supporters. Can you spare a moment or two and join me?

Thank you for your continued support in everything! Without you, I wouldn’t be able to continue to share my work.

Until next time,

Tammy

#ThrowbackThursday: Revisiting My Journey Through #Poetry #ARTG

Throwback Thursday layers

 

It’s Throwback Thursday and two years ago this week, I was getting ready to publish my first book of poetry…on my own without a publisher. Fear and inexperience threatened to derail my resolve. No matter how scared I was to do it, I knew I needed to get the collection out there of all to see. I wanted to share my journey to find happiness. I had gone through hell and back again and detailed it all through poetry. When I couldn’t find the words to speak, my poetry came through for me. It helped me work through some of the most painful and dark times in my life to the happiest here with my soul mate.

It took many years, a failed marriage and a shattered heart but in the end I found my happily ever after with my husband, Liam. Neither of us were looking for a long-term relationship when we met. Both of us had come through nasty breakups and I was legally separated from the first husband. It was a mess but through it all we were able to find each other and a love that wouldn’t be denied.

smallest cover

 

Back to the poetry book. Follow Me: Poetry from the Heart and Soul. The first cover was a quick photo I found in some clip art. I didn’t have the money to get a good stock photo at the time, but when I did I updated the cover to what it is now. Some people may still see that old cover out there and when I see it, I smile. Like me, it’s gone through changes to its last edition. I have that original cover framed on my wall above my writing area. When we have the new office set up in the second bedroom, I’ll move it in there and put up all the covers. As with the poems, the covers detail my journey as an author, publisher and cover artist. I’m proud of them all!

 

As with my covers, the video trailers I’ve made have evolved from my first one. I’ve learned a lot and had tons of fun in the process. Here’s the video for this book. It showcases one of the poems in the collection that encourages the reader to follow their hearts because in the end that’s where your true love will be found.

 

 

Follow Me New cover Large

 

 

I’d like to share another poem from the book, one that I wrote when Liam and I were in the early stages of our relationship. He was active duty military and could get called away at any time. Both of us were dating others at the time but moving toward becoming each other’s one and only. The more I wanted to pull away from him, afraid I’d be hurt again, the more I had longed to be wrapped in his arms. Come to find out, he felt the same!

* * * *

Safe In Your Arms

Tossing and turning

Restless and burning

Aching to feel your body

Close to mine.

The bed that we once shared

Seems cold and lonely

Without you to hold me tight.

When you are here,

All sadness and pain disappear

And I am safe in your arms

Every night.

Once again tossing and turning

Restless and yearning

For the day you will

Return back to me.

Knowing in my heart of hearts

Your First Love will always call…

Taking you away to the arms

Of the beautiful, cruel and majestic

Lady of the Sea.

Knowing all along

Your heart would not belong

To me alone…

I still chose to share mine

With you.

For the Lady promised

She would keep you safe

And bring you home

When your journey together

Was through.

Tossing and turning.

My heart restless and burning

For your love,

Your touch and your kiss.

Hoping and praying

That the coming dawn would finally bring

The day I will be safe

In your arms…

And once again our hearts  joined

In peaceful bliss.

©Tammy Dennings Maggy

All Rights Reserved

3/28/2011

Follow Me New cover Large

You can find this collection as an ebook for only 99 cents from the following retailers. It’s also available in print.

Amazon

Barnes and Noble

Kobo

iTunes

All Romance/Omnilit

Smashwords

Sassy Vixen Publishing

@dochappycamper Joins the #FreedomHop Celebrating Reading Across the Genres


Live. LovRomance Beckonse. Read.

 THE FREEDOM HOP hosted by ROMANCE BECKONS

As a book lover, don’t take for granted your freedom to read. In this era of technology, books are at our fingertips and reading is something we make time for. eBook, audiobooks and good old-fashioned paperbacks give readers of all types the opportunity to enjoy reading.

Which type of books do you enjoy? Is it the fingernail-biting suspense? The thrill of an erotic romance? Or the fantasy of paranormal romance? Do you like your books to take you out of this world? Or is all about the possibilities in a contemporary romance?

 

Welcome to Behind Closed Doors and the next stop on the Freedom Hop. I’m author Tammy Dennings Maggy and I’m thrilled to take part in this event with thirty-nine others to celebrate our freedom to “live, love, and READ!” Books have always been my best friend. In fact, I can’t remember a time when I didn’t have my face buried in a book. There are pictures of me, barely able to sit up on my own holding a book in my chubby little baby fingers. All of those stories opened up so many avenues for me. My love of animals came from reading. My adoration of Science and English came from reading. The shy, introvert became the bold and brassy heroine through the books I read growing up. All of them made me who I am today and help me to tell the tales of my own characters. 

Follow Me New cover LargeWhen I went through some of life’s toughest challenges, I knew I could always rely on my books to get me through. Those stories encouraged me to make up worlds of my own and share them with other readers. Hopefully, I can give back to them what all those authors have given me over the years. One specific challenge I had to get through, was the loss of my step dad in 2005 to Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. This time of year is still a little hard for me to get through. You see, Dad’s birthday was July 4th. Every single year we would use his birthday as an excuse to have a big gathering at our house with BBQ, swimming, volleyball and of course tons of fireworks. Dad loved this time of year not only for his birthday, but because as a Marine he participated in many celebrations honoring the freedoms we hold dear in the United States. 

Five years after his death, I made the journey back home after my first marriage fell apart and love from the past shattered my heart beyond repair. I was at my lowest point then and about to find my path to my happily ever after—but I didn’t know it at the time. The following is a poem I wrote on the plane ride from California to Michigan. This is one of several poems I published in Follow Me: Poetry from the Heart and Soul.

 

 

Home Again

©Tammy Dennings Maggy 2010

As soon as the wheels touched down,
The memories came flooding back.
Last time here was to say goodbye to the head of our family,
Our Rock, Provider, Protector.

Could feel him with me today,
As I left yet another plane.
Could feel his hand in mine;
Could hear him whisper
“it’s gonna be okay. You’ll get through this too.”
I am here. Lean on me.
Lean on the family.
That is why you are going home.

Five long years have passed
Since he was laid to rest.
But his guidance remains
Pulling me home again when life became unbearable.

So many emotions run through me as I drive North toward Home:
Shame to have failed yet again in love,
Failed at the marriage he had blessed.
Ashamed to have let another steal my heart and soul
so completely and leave me devastated.

But this time the Fixer of Broken Hearts and Souls
Was not there to pick up the pieces
and give me a reason for going home

This year was supposed to be different
Thought I found another to help me mend.
For three long years I barely existed,
Losing myself with each passing hour and day.

An old friend returned the smile to my face
And the laugh to my soul.
My Heart was nearly mended enough to trust again.
But the love that was promised was not true.
It was not meant to be.
So the heart that could not mend, shattered all the more.

Now I return home to my family and friends.
They will help bring the joy back into my life,
The smile to my face, and the laugh to my heart and soul.
For this is why I return again.
This is why I am going home.

I’ve used my poetry as outlines for a few more series I have underway and have included some poems in books I have out now. My vampire inspired poetry Courtship of the Vampyre details the stories I’m telling in my Kayne Legacy Series. The first of which should be out by the end of this year. In The Surrender of Julia (Now and Forever 3) I used my poetry for wedding vows. Julia’s story is so far my most controversial book and one my dad would have been tickled pink over. He always challenged me to follow my dreams and my heart no matter where the path would lead. I knew Julia’s story had to be told even though others told me I shouldn’t switch to a F/F coupling when the first two books in the series were M/F.

Well, Dad. I did it. I followed my heart and Julia’s story is now out there for everyone to enjoy.

In honor of the hop and my Dad’s memory, I’m giving away FOUR eBook copies of The Surrender of Julia. If you want a copy, all you have to do is leave a comment below with your contact information. I’ll announce the winners on Tuesday July 8th.

BLURB

The Surrender of Julia Cover 2500 long sideL.A. artist phenom Julia Santos appeared to have it all. After a nearly two year long dry spell, her creativity was at its peak and she had her muse and model Jacob Hartley to thank for it. He brought the fire and raw sexuality back to her sculptures and into her bedroom, and a sense of security that only one other person in her life had ever given her. At last she had found the perfect balance between her professional and private lives, until the day a single call from someone in her past threatened to tear her world apart.

Fearful of losing all she’d worked so hard to accomplish, Julia delved deeper into the hedonistic lifestyle she’d come to rely on to give her an escape from the horrors of her past. Instead of bringing her comfort, her sexual urges lead her down the path of destruction; not only for herself, but those around her. With Jacob fighting for his life after a near fatal motorcycle accident and Julia on the brink of death herself, Fate and her Guardian Angel Daniel intervene and transport her to a safe haven called the Island.

There she’s given a choice: stay on the Island and wait for her next rebirth, or go back and fight to be with the one who has been there for her through every lifetime. Will she take the easy way out and leave all the pain behind, or will she choose the long and hard road reliving the horrors of her childhood in order to have her happily ever after with the Mistress of her dreams?

 

Make sure you check out the other blogs in the hop. You’ll have chances to win some fabulous prizes and maybe even find some new authors to add to your “must read” lists.

Have fun!
~Tammy

CHECK OUT ALL THESE GREAT AUTHORS for books you might enjoy!

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#Holiday Surprise from @SassyVixPub Authors

Friday Fantasy Free For All

Welcome to Behind Closed Doors! Today is the start of a fabulous sale of all the books Sassy Vixen Publishing has put out so far. Of course that includes all of mine except the two I have out with Siren Bookstrand. In just a few short weeks, I’ll continue that series with Sassy Vixen Publishing with the release of The Surrender of Julia (Now and Forever 3)

Surrender of Julia advertisement

Before that happens, SVP has decided to offer my poetry, Lia’s novella, Tawny’s novella and the Christmas anthology all for 50% off on All Romance ebooks, Omnilit and Smashwords. To get the discount at All Romance or Omnilit, all you have to do is go to the book’s page on their sites and click to purchase. The price will already be slashed. For Smashwords, you need the individual codes listed in the banners below. 

So go on and grab all of our titles while the sale lasts. You have until midnight December 23rd.  Enjoy!

Season Book Sale

Book Sale for Forbidden Destiny

Book Sale for Brigid

Book Sale for FollowMe

Book Sale for Courtship of Vampyre